Where Everybody Knows Your Name

Full disclosure: I was a serious FarmVille Farmer during college. My nights normally played out as follows: Go out; come home; harvest my crops; plant some strawberries to harvest in the morning (they only took two hours to ripen) and go to bed ready for another day of tending to my hoe. I was meticulous and purposeful with my produce--and I saw the benefits quickly. After a certain amount of achievements I was awarded access to crops of higher pay off and economy. I saved enough FarmVille profits to buy the best benches and the most handsome, blue ribbon-worthy livestock so all my FarmVille friends passing through could see/be jealous of my spoils. A proverbial Garden of Eden, if I may. 

Then life got in the way. It was time to head to the big city. 

But like all things you truly love--you eventually find your way home. I recently reinstated FarmVille on my Facebook and went back to my roots. And this was my greeting:

I don't know who Marie is--but I think she might be my manager. She made sure I came home to a heroes welcome with my name on the virtual agriculture marquee. I feel ready to "take the reins" back on my affairs. On my farm I am adored. 

FarmVille, and indeed probably all Zynga games, has a lot of naysayers. If you care to see ignorance at its finest you needn't look any further than Urban Dictionary's 'definition' ascribed to the game:

"...While the rest of the people in the world, who deserve to live, are out living their lives continue to procreate, all of the inept addicts who are busy locked up by their computers playing farmfuck will slowly make the world a better place, right before they get to harvest that last goddamn crop, by dying."

--Anonymous Urban Dictionary Commenter (read as: Hater)

This is one of the most hateful/grammatically confusing things I have ever encountered. I will never apologize or feel embarrassed for being a successful farmer. Everything I have achieved--and WILL achieve, I have done without the help of the haters or government subsidies. And for the record I don't think the world is a better place if this person plans to or has already successfully procreated.

Is it so wrong to wish for fanfare every time you enter a room? Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name. That's how I feel about my Farmville Farm. Whether you're a believer or not, feel free to come 'round the Old Gilchrist Farm anytime you wish. I will be waiting for you. 

It was the Best of Times, it was the Worst of Times

As I tweeted a picture of the Veggie Tales fruit snacks that I had for dinner, I got to thinking about technology and self-expression. The interplay between the two has certainly progressed throughout my life. I would be remiss to not dedicate my inaugural blog post to this topic, and it would be a further disservice to followers if I did not discuss something that inevitably exacerbated ALL of our growing pains...

AIM   One of my favorite conversation starters is to ask someone what their AIM screen name was. Seriously, try it. The answer is inevitably hilarious. In my case, it is a rarity to find someone with a worse SN in the closet than mine. I was "DusTBunniE29g." While most other girls were Princess whatever or something Angel....I was a dustbunnie, and I don't know why.

Once we all got on AIM, the social dynamic in the middle/high school shifted dramatically. Your choices in font and color became your identity. Relationships began and ended over the internet. A simple copy and paste job from a 'private' conversation could ruin you, and if that happened to you, you could at least still be friends with SmarterChild (until he started charging $, that is). "OMG" and "LOL" became a way to express extreme emotion, even if you were just staring stone-faced at the computer. <3 became a symbol of love, and so it necessarily followed that </3 became a symbol of heart break, loss, or a big fight with your BFF that you and said friend were both too stubborn to apologize for. The anatomy of the AIM user's profile is fascinating.

AIM Profile

The AIM Profile was a sacred space. It was each user's chance to really show everyone who they were. For a girl, the recipe for the base of an acceptable AIM profile was strict and unforgiving. First, you take your name preceded AND followed by a SYMMETRICAL (this is key) series of *~*~*. Your name was typically followed by your relationship status. The standard choices were: "Single", "Taken", or "Single....but looking."

After the base was established, users usually took the opportunity to exercise a degree of creativity. You could list your hobbies. Something akin to "LAX 4 LYF" or "Soccer rules!" could be acceptable, if executed properly. Shout-outs to your main girls and/or Dave Matthews Band quotes were timeless choices. For the misunderstood AIM user, a Brand New / Yellowcard quote followed by an ever mysterious ellipses would suffice in ensuring that you appeared to be both artsier and deeper than your mere mortal, immature classmates.

(ex: "Fix me to a chain around your neck and wear me like a nickel...")

In between different profiles, it was common to see an "Under Construction" message as the place holder. I always found this to be helpful.

Away Messages

Surely one could not be expected to ALWAYS be at the computer tending to the needs of AIM buddies. In the event that a user had to go eat dinner or do homework, the away message was there to alert everyone. The "brb" away message, though uninspired and boring, got the job done. If you were at the movies and/or TGIFridays with your besties, it was crucial to make certain that all of your buddies knew you were out enjoying yourself while they weren't. If you were angry or upset about something, your away message could be used as a tool to reach out to people. After all, in the end we all just wanted someone to send us a "lylas"/"lylab" during trying times. John Mayer or Maroon 5 seemed to be the standard choices for attention-seekers.

(ex. "I don't mind spending everyday out on your corner in the pouring rain. Look for the girl with a broken smile, ask her if she wants to stay a while...")

  
"I am away from my computer right now."

Everyone knows what this means. You messed up BIG TIME if you were fighting with someone and suddenly this pops up in response to your last message. The Times New Roman font, the Size 12, the black font, the period at the end of the sentence--all tell-tale signs that your conversation is officially over. Person X literally has nothing to say to you. You have inhibited Person X's ability to compose a witty and cool message. He/she wished to be curt and emotionless. You took the color and cool font out of their life for the rest of the night, at least. Depending on the circumstance, this type of away message could signal that your relationship with Person X was irreconcilable. 

The Actual Conversation

princessxo: hey, sup?

GatoradeRush89: nm, u?

princessxo: sh, jc

GatoradeRush89: cool cool

If your conversation ever managed to move beyond the obligatory opening, you were in the clear. Normally you would then proceed to talk about what's going on at school or have a somewhat deep conversation about life. It was delightful.

 

Like any great tragic hero, AIM had a irreconcilable flaw--users could not post photo albums to portray to AIM Buddies everywhere that they were having more fun than their friends at college. AIM followed behind Rome, Greece, and the Ottomans into history as one of the great empires that inevitably fell. We have since moved into a new phase -- which I have affectionately coined "Pax Facebook."